Arrogance/Takabbur - Purification of the heart

Takabbur is the biggest thing where our nafs is involved and it is probably one of the biggest diseases of the heart.(We will start with this disease insha’Allah)

Verse:  Allah Knows what they reveal and what they conceal, and verily Allah does not love the mustakbireen(people who are arrogant).

So the word in Arabic language is takabbur. In English we call it arrogance. This is an internal disease of the heart but it also has an outward manifestation. There are some diseases that are just internal, they don’t have any outward manifestations. But takabbur is something that is inside and it also comes outside.

There are many verses about takabbur in Quran and often it comes that people who have takabbur, they are the ones who don’t believe.

Verse: (Allah Ta’Ala says)I will Divert My signs from those who act arrogantly. If they see the way of righteousness, they do not choose it as their way. And if they see a way of error, they choose it for their way.

So one sign of people who have takabbur is how do they act. They turn away from the Signs of Allah Ta’Ala without right! And if they see a sign, they don’t believe it. They see something to be haqq, right but they wont accept it and they wont act upon it. Instead they would adopt the erroneous way!

Verse: those who dispute Allah’s Signs without any authority. And this is greatly hateful in the Sight of Allah and in the sight of those who believe; thus does Allah Seal the heart of every arrogant tyrant.

This is also a sign of people of takabbur that they are argumentative. No one put them in that position or authority but still they would like to argue. They are argumentative by nature. And the outcome of takabbur is that Allah Seals their hearts(when they stay consistent in their arrogance). This then is another major problem because then a person who has it wont even realize it.

And what is most strange is that people who have takabbur, they don’t just do takabbur with people, they have takabbur with Allah Ta’Ala.

Famous verse in Quran;

‘Call on Me and I will answer you’ ie Make dua but right afterwards Allah Ta’Ala says, ‘Verily those who in arrogance turn away from my worship, they will enter Hell!’

So another sign is mentioned here in this verse that those who don’t make dua, don’t pray to Allah, this is a sign that they have takabbur in their hearts. So what would then be their result? They will enter Hell in disgrace and humiliation.

So those who have arrogance, they don’t just turn away from other people, they don’t just turn away from the right path, from the signs of Allah, they also turn away from Allah’s ibadat/worship, from dua! Dua is so simple, but they have so much takabbur that they don’t even want to beg from Allah. This is the highest level of takabbur.

Allah Ta’Ala says in Quran, ‘ Allah Ta’Ala does not love the arrogant people’

So there are two words for this in Urdu as well as in English. Takabbur which is arrogance and fakhar which means boasting, showing off. So those who have arrogance they brag, this is also a sign of takabbur.

Ahadith e Mubarakah about takabbur

It comes in a Hadith e Qudsi;

Allah Ta’Ala says, ‘Takabbur is My Shawl and Azmat(Greatness) is My Garment and whoever tries to take it from Me, I will put them in Fire.’

Another very srong hadith;

‘He who has an atom’s amount of takabbur in his heart will not enter Jannah.’

Even such a minute amount of takabbur will not be accepted! So we have to purify ourselves. That is why Scholars have said that if you look at different diseases of heart, takabbur is that one disease that even the slightest amount is wrong. It is 1000% negative. Atom’s amount indicates this is an atomic disease of the diseases of heart, an atomic bomb! What does an atomic bomb does? It wipes out everything, irrespective of good and bad stuff. So this atomic bomb of takabbur also wipes out all deeds even if they be very good. And this is one of those disease that person has to work on it throughout their life. So if you take it out from one place, it will sprout from somewhere else.

Arrogant People mentioned in Quran Azeem ul Sha’n

1)      Iblees.

Iblees is the first being who did takabbur. What did he say? Ana kahyrum-min-hu.. ‘I am better than him (Hazrat Adam as)’

Then he also presented his reason that ‘I am better than him because I am made out of fire and he is made out of clay’

And what’s strange is that even his reasoning was wrong. Because fire is destructive whereas clay is constructive. And clay by nature has humility in it, and fire is something that goes up, it has takabbur.

And it is said about iblees that he had a high level of ilm, he did a lot of worship, but still he fell in this major sin of takabbur. And this atomic bomb of takabbur ruined his thousands of years of worship and knowledge.

2)      Fira’un.

Fira’un was also from amongst arrogant people. It comes about him that he said that ‘Ana rabbukum ul a’ala…..I am your highest lord’

This is also an interesting point in Fira’un’s narration that he did a lot of bad things, mass murder of Bani Israiel and their children and so much other evil but Allah Ta’Ala continued giving him reprieve but when he uttered this sentence, as it comes in Surah Naaziat, then Allah Swt caught him off guard. So his takabbur lead to his downfall.

3)      Nation of ‘Aad.

The nation of Hazrat Hud(as). About these it comes that they had a lot of physical powerand that physical power made them arrogant and they claimed that ‘Who can be more powerful than us?’ So they also uttered these words of arrogance and then they were destroyed.

So people of takabbur tries to raise and elevate themselves but Allah Ta’Ala Shows them their worth and disgraces them.

On the contrary, it comes in Hadith that, ‘Who humbles themselves for Allah swt, Allah Swt Elevates them.’

This is something we can also see in our own Ummah, in Scholars that those who spent their lives in humility, Allah Swt raised their status and those who thought themselves to be something, Allah Swt disgraced them.

So like we mentioned before, it is the most deeply rooted spiritual disease and causes the most destruction. And practitioners of Tazkiya say that takabbur is the last spiritual disease to leave a person. It is the hardest to cure. And it is also very tricky because a person tries to make themselves humble and humble and then they think that ok now I am humble!

Like a famous Scholar, Ibn AtaUllah(ra) said that;

‘If you are aware of your humility, the you are an arrogant!’

So feeling that I am humble now actually means that you are arrogant!

As a Punjabi poem goes

Mit mit k mit ja faqeera, mit mit k mit ja

Is mitne nu samajhna mitna, is tu win mit ja faqeera, mit mit k mit ja

Je tu samjhea mei haan mitiya, aje wi nhi tou mitya

Erase yourself to such an extent that you even erase the feeling that I am erased! You should not even have that! Now this is very high level. This is beyond our understanding!

So you shouldn’t even REGARD yourself as humble. Viewing yourself as a humble person is also a sign of Takabbur. So this is the whole purpose of tasawwuf, that you erase yourself completely.

Maulana Nadwi asked Maulaana Ashraf Ali Thanwi that what is the purpose of tassawwuf? And Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanwi (r.h.) replied, that “it is only one thing, and that is to erase oneself”, to this extent. So this is something that a person cannot think or be aware of their humility.

Note: But still scholars say, that a person does not feel like they are humble, they should still act humbly. This is a major concept in our Deen to mimic, or mirror, another person’s acts. If you can’t BE humble, ACT humble:mimic the people who are humble. And this is a very important aspect - the way you act, the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you dress - everything you do externally has an internal effect.  And you see this. Women are perfect examples. If you dress nicely, you get ready, you do make up, do your hair and wear pretty clothes, you know you’re looking nice: you will feel nice, you will talk nice, you will feel like you are attracting people’s attention.  You will know that you are looking nice, and you will feel something on the inside.The day you don’t look nice, it will show, you will feel down about yourself, it will show on your demeanor; the way you walk and talk and act. Just like that, if we act like a humble person, maybe Allah Ta’ala uski imitation ki wajah say hamaray ander who asal daal dain gay. We will feel the feelings of humility.

So this is a very secret – and this is not hypocrisy!This is not nifaq.It is a practice, an exercise, that if you want to become a certain way just act. And you see this in actors, people who study theatre and acting, they actually teach you, how to put yourself in that role. Sometimes we can’t become the real versions, but maybe maybe by imitating those who are truly on the Deen, and are humble, we can also truly become humble, in sha Allah. So this is very important : to imitate. To imitate people who are accepted in the Eyes of Allah can and does make a big difference.

What is the definition of takabbur?

It is very easy: it is to regard yourself as better than other people, in any attribute. It is not important that it be a worldly attribute: it can be any characteristic, any attribute, in which one regards themselves as beter than any other person.

Levels of Takabbur

There are 3 main levels of Takabbur:

1)      Ujub: conceit, egotistical, being full of yourself; me me-me, self-centered; the world is just about you. Not necessarily that you think less of anybody but that you are very self-centered. Everything is about yourself. And the person can be involved in this if you are in love with yourself: your personality, your looks, your degree, your skills, it can be anything; that you are such a good house wife; you are such a good mother. So this is ujab. And ujab is just an entry level of Takabbur. It’s not Takabbur but it’s not a good thing either.

2)      Kibr: to view yourself as better, but not to act upon it. So it’s more internal, and is relative to other people. So this is like you know to be status conscious, and to think that I am better than this person or that person but not to act upon it. This is what is sometimes translated as pride.

3)      Takabbur:is the highest level and has all of the above mentioned aspects. That you view yourself as better and you treat other people as worse as well. And a lot of our problems stem from Takabbur: the unjustness in this world is from Takabbur. The thought that you are better: racism, discrimination, cutting somebody in line- a very small incident: but it is because you think you’re better than that person, therefore you deserve to be served first and to be first in line – the actual reason is Takabbur and why people do these things. And you see people in this world around you, the injustice with poor people, lower class and uneducated people.

So Takabbur is the highest forms of arrogance

Signs of Takabbur

1.                   Is when you regard yourself, to view yourself as good and to only see your good attributes. This is very easy to fall into, especially when you go and you interact with other people, you may feel like that the other person is so and so; you might not say it to anybody but in your heart you get that feeling that the other person does all these bad things but I don’t, and I have these good characteristics and qualities, etc.  So it is regarding yourself as “good” and only seeing the good attributes within yourself. And this is very dangerous.

                Sheikh Ahmed sir hindi rh says, he has actually written a book on deed-e-kasoor, that when Allah Ta’ala brings forth for you your negative qualities, it is actually a great blessing from Allah Ta’ala. Hazrat Umar (radiyAllah hu anhu) would say, that whosoever brings me a gift of my shortcomings to me, I will make pray for his forgiveness! A gift of shortcomings! Think: how much humility and humbleness that Hazrat Umar (r.a.) had! He was thinking that I have so many faults and that people present his shortcomings to him. We, on the otherhand, have so much takabbur that if somebody criticizes us: we will defend ourselves, justify ourselves and find so many excuses. If somebody just says you shouldn’t be late, you say “no, no,I’m not late;I’m not this;I’m not that; we’ll come up with ten excuses! You know this is a sign: to not accept your faults. Not to view any of your things as a negative quality.

2.                   A major sign: disliking anyone’s advice or constructive criticism. If somebody chances to give you advice. Or if somebody advises you to not do something a certain way, and that you should do it this way. Then our reaction would probably be to think that who does she thing she is? Doesn’t she know who I am? I know better. And this is very hard, sometimes we might think, that they don’t know who I am; they don’t know I am doing this course. But sometimes all you need to do is to accept it. And the way to recognize this is to say that sometimes I don’t know everything.

                My own Personal Anecdote:

                One time I was praying somewhere, outside Lahore, and this lady said to me, that your prayer was invalid, your shalwar (lower garment) was above your ankles. I looked at her, and I had a pinch inside: that I do salaah workshops, and I don’t know that my namaz is invalid?! And later on I saw for myself that she was right! And that what I felt was wrong! And then I realized that that was takabbur. So you see, that this is the way to diagnose. We can’t always apologize to somebody by calling them.

                So how do we cancel it out? We act against our feeling. I started thanking her and saying, jazakallah for letting me know. And that I will repeat my namaz. So when you want to go against the feeling of takabbur, you have to go against your nafs. Your nafs will say to not talk to her, to not even look at her, stay angry with her, don’t give her any attention. But no! You have to go back and say thank you, smile, and talk nicely and tell them that they said the absolutely correct thing to say. That will feel sooo nice, that feeling will be so good. And to say that I am an Aalima, or I’m this or that, will gain you no good whatsoever. To actually put yourself in a situation where you accept the fault as your own; and this is something that when you know this: to act against what your heart is saying.

3.                   A person displays vanity. They like listening to their praise. And if they do not get praise they feel as if that the other person does not know my stature, my rank, they don’t know who I am. If this is the feeling we get then we know that this is also a sign of takabbur.

4.                   Another major sign, is when you have to do something small, you feel like this is a burden, and this is something beneath me, this is not my position, it is under my dignity to do this. These are signs of takabbur when you feel these things. These are feelings that you need to diagnose yourself of – something like a self-diagnosis.

Causes of Takabbur(Asbaab-e-Takabbur)

1.                   Knowledge: either deeni or worldly. A person who has knowledge, by nature wants to share their knowledge. That is a good thing, but some people want to show off their knowledge, and that’s bad. And sometimes a student will do it by asking a question to show off what they know. This questioning - a good question is half of knowledge –but within the good question is an additional intention that it should not be for ostentation (to show off, riya kaari); it is not to put the teacher down in any way; the intentionbehind the question should be truly to understand and truly to act upon it.

                So sometimes knowledge can lead a person to Takabbur because they want praise, they want recognition; they say, I have knowledge; they want people to know their stature, and they view themselves as better than everyone else because they have an MA or PHD or because they are doing a Classical Islamic Learning course or because they’re doing an Alima course.

                And actually Imam Ghazali (rh) says:  that people of knowledge are in greater danger of arrogance than anyone elsePeople who seek Knowledge, they’re more in danger of falling into arrogance. They fall into this disease a lot more quickly; and it affects them in a deeper way as well; which makes it all the more rigorous to remove as well. Often you see scholars - scholars who have takabbur!andwho do a lot of things against deen, they have a lot of hasad (envy) and a lot of other problems.

                A famous story:

                 Faiza and Abu Al Fazl,were the Ulama of the Mughal Emperor Akbar: they were ULAMA (Scholars)! They knew Quran, they knew Hadith, they even wrote a tafseer of ahadith! But they were called Uama-e-Soo. Ulama-e-soo means bad, evil. They only did those things which Akbar told them to do. Akbar said write a fatwa that to prostrate infront of the King is permissible in Islam; and they signed it. This is what the Ulama-e-soo do, whatever the government say, even if it is against the Deen, they do it. So these were two scholars who did this. This was also the era of Shaykh Ahmed sir-hindi (rh); and when they said that you have to prostrate in honour in front of the king Akbar. To force this, they made a small door, and the Shaykh did was that he came in backwards. And by doing so he was saved by prostrating infront of anyone other than Allah! But then they put another fatwa (legal ruling) – their hasad(envy) had increased to such a level because of arrogance – that Shaykh Ahmed sir Hindi should be put in jail. So you know they did these things all because they had this ilmi takabbur (Takabbur on Knowledge). They thought they were better because they had so much knowledge, but their knowledge did not give them the noor (light) of this ilm. In fact it let them to their destruction.

                It comes in a hadith: That on the Day of Judgment that there will be some people that will be asked that why did you do this? A scholar will be asked why did you study this ilm, and the scholar will reply that it was for Your Raza (Pleasure), oh Allah; to which Allah swt will reply that you only did it so that people would praise you, And so you will be put in Hell. Right?  So a person who has knowledge is not necessarily safe from this takabbur.

                Andthe deeni takabbur is worse than worldly takabbur. Deeni takabbur: a person who thinks they are better than somebody, because I’m more pious, or more knowledge of the Quran, I can read the Quran better, I do so much worship. That is actually worse because you don’t REGARD it as wrong!

Worldly takabbur:a person who has Takabbur because they have money or looks: everyone says it is wrong, even the person who has it, will say it is wrong. But the person who has deeni takabbur will say that no I am completely in the right, because of the knowledge that I possess.

2.                   Second reason of takabbur is worship. You want people to view you as pious and when you view yourself as pious, you start to think the rest of the people are not good enough. I am hijabi, jilbabi, and I cover; yet the rest of these people are still the same. So thinking like that; judging people: just on the basis of what they wear; or how much they cover. So this is something that is also very dangerous. And you will come by a lot of ahadith.

                An incident of Bani Israel:

                That there was a famous worshipper, a friend of Allah (Wali Ullah), and he used to worship a lot. It was famous about him that whenever he would walk anywhere a cloud would follow him; it used to be hot and a cloud would always be following him. So once there was a very faasiq (sinful) man, and he was going to go on a trip, and it was very hot weather. And he thought to himself that I’m such a bad person, maybe if I go with this friend of Allah, and he lets me walk with him, maybe I will take some affect from his company and be able to become good. So he went to that Wali Ullah, and he told him what he had been thinking and that he wanted to travel with him, that I want to be with you, I want to walk with you, to travel with you. The Wali Ullah replied, that no you can’t walk with me, I fear that your sins might have a bad affect on me, as I see that you have sinned greatly, and I am a pious person and you are not worthy of my company. So you go your own way and do not travel with me. So the sinning personwho wanted to go with him; he felt sad, his heart was in pain, he was thinking that I am SUCH a sinning serveant that this friend of Allah did not want to walk with me, sit with me, or be with me, and spend time with me. And so he thought he should go his own way, and as he did so, as he walked away, that cloud followed him! We know from this incident that when a person has Takabbur – the Wali said that he was more pious than the other person, and that I don’t want to spend my time with him because he doesn’t have the same piety as me – this shows that Allah Ta’ala then changes the situation. And this is what we see: a person who is humble, even though they are sinning, Allah Ta’ala is more Merciful towards such people. And a person who has takabbur, even though they are very Muttaqeen (God fearing, pious) outwardly, Allah Ta’ala does not accept their good deeds! So this is something that we have to realize that when we view other people: to not to EVER view ANYONE as beneathe us!

                And this is a VERY difficult task: because this happens naturally! Especially, when a person starts coming closer to the Deen, they start to naturally think that the other people are not as good as they are, or not as advanced as they are. So we may have that this one girl saying this that when you go to a party, and you see a girl who is wearing sleeveless, and you think “oooh you know I’m better than her, atleast im wearing hijab, right?”

                Sooo, what should you think? Well, you should still view her as better than you! How do you do that? Because you should think, that if she was given the same opportunities I was given then she would definitely be better than me. And scholars have written that REAL humbleness; the real way to get rid of takabbur, is to think that just on the pure possibility, if this person was given the same opportunities, the knowledge, the background I received, if they were put in my situation, they would be ten times, a hundred times, better than me. Right? Then, that’s not going to be takabbur. You should view everyone with the full possibility that they are better than you.

                Even the kaafir (non-muslim): Now how can a non-muslim be better than a Muslim? How to understand this? Well, to understand, that IF this person was a Muslim, they would be better than me. To think to such an extent! And THAT is the way a person can get rid of takabbur in their heart. To always view other people that they can be better than me. They have the potential to be better than me. I don’t know why Allah ta’ala is extremely Merciful on me to put me in such a favorable situation, it is all Allah and it has nothing to do with me, and to be grateful on that.

3.                   Another cause of takabbur which often happens is lineage. Nasb. To be Sayyad, to be of a prestigious family background, to have pride and to be boastful on it, is to have Takabbur about ones lineage. And it is very important, and this is very prevalent in our culture/ society. But you have to think that who was ashraf ul makhluqat? The Prophet sallalaahu ‘alaihi wasallim, he told his daughter, that DON’T think you are the daughter of the Prophet (s.a.w.); don’t think that you are the daughter of the Prophet sallalaahu alaihi wasallim and on the Day of Judgement I will be able to help you. And he said to Hazrat Fatima (r.a.) that whoever’s actions hold them back their lineage will not be able to take them onwards. So to think that a person’s nasb is something to have pride or takabbur about, theProphet (s.a.w.) totally denounced that.

                And there is a famous hadith that the most Akram, the most highest of you, the most noble of you are the people who have taqwa. It’s not dunya (worldly status or possessions), it’s not nasb or lineage that makes a person better, it is actually taqwa that makes a person better in the eyes of the Prophet (s.a.w.)

                Prophet Nooh (a.s.): He was a Prophet, his own son didn’t accept islam!so this is something that even a Prophetic lineage won’t be enough. So, if a person thinks that I’m this Cast or I’m this family, then that is really nothing. In front of Allah Ta’ala, that is nothing. Lineage is only to recognize different people; not so that people take pride in it.

4.                   Next reason people have takabbur is beauty. . Beauty is something that commonly for women it happens to be more prevalent.The way they’re dressed, how they look, whether they’re fair, or what physique they have, that leads a person to have takabbur as well. And we see this a lot too.

I’m sure many of you have seen these situations: where a girl can have everything. She can be beautiful, she can have intelligence, but she also has takabbur and that leads to her downfall - that often she is the one who comes home divorced. And the rest of her sisters who may be average looking, are happily married in their homes. So often you have these situation and stories. Where a girl who says something in a way of Takabbur, I read in a book, that these boys, what are they? All I have to do is give them a signal and they can lick the dirt of my shoes. Saying these things about boys – that’s takabbur right? So this beauty is not in any way related to Acceptance in the Court of Allah. If Allah Ta’ala so Wills to accept it, He can, and if He Will to reject it, so He can. So why should we have takabbur about our beauty?

5.                   Next cause is also very common:wealth and this is notorious. It is a common belief that whoever is wealthy has more Takabbur. And this is often the case, but many a times this may not be the case as well. There’s a saying in Arabic: that one of the most Noble things in the World is a rich man who is humble.

Easy way for a remedy is: Easy Come, Easy Go. Money is such a thing that it sometimes come and sometimes leaves. It is a Blessing of Allah. It is fruitless to have Takabbur for money.

6.                   Next thing is Power and Strength. When a person is young and strong, they have more takabbur. When they are weak and hungry they have no takabbur. A wise man once said: that if firoun had ever experienced hunger, he would never hane said, ana Rabbukum ul a’ala (I am your lord most high) Ma’az Allah.

When a person has hunger or is in a weak position then the characteristics of Takabbur within them get weakened or lessen.

7.                   The last sabab of takabbur, is having a lot of anything. Whether its popularity or connections. You can boast that I have all these connections, in places, I have the most students, or I am very popular. This is something that can also be a means of takabbur, but to always remember that firoun was very popular. He was popular in the sense that everybody would listen to him, but he was rejected. And he has no acceptance in the Eyes of Allah Ta’ala.

So having takabbur about these things, no one has the right in having takabbur. We should have this Hadith written on our walls. Especially in the work of DEEN, when we start thinking that I am doing so much for Deen, to remember the Hadith that Allah Ta’ala sometimes takes His work for Deen from a sinner. So it doesn’t mean that if Allah Ta’ala has put you in a situation of serving His Deen, you are automatically accepted, that doesn’t mean that Allah Ta’ala is necessarily happy with you or you are accepted in the eyes of Allah Ta’ala. The key then, is to always have this fear and a fear of takabbur in your heart.

REMEDIES:

Two types:

1.       Ilmi (how to think, what your attitude needs to be like)

2.       Amali (practical implementation, the baby steps)

ILMI is actually again, thinking.

i.                     Is to KNOW yourself. To remember your reality. To KNOW the hidden sins. The dirt, the sins that you hide from the rest of the world, to really know it in your heart. Before going to sleep at night, to look in your heart and see the dirt that fills your heart. And this is when you know this, then you will never have takabbur.

ii.                   And to keep an eye on your own short comings. To always look at your own weaknesses and shortcomings.

iii.                  Remembering your origins, that where were we born from? It comes in the Quran as well, again and again, that the human being sees the material from which they were created? A weak drop, a weak water. So to see, where have I come from? What have I been made up of? Once you ponder over this, can you have Takabbur over your weak beginnings? A wise man once said, that a person who was born from a place of najaasa (impurity), how can he ever think high of himself?

Remember where you came from? How you were created?

iv.                 Another is to remember your end. That when we die, we are going to end up in the sand. That same dirt, sand, ground in which we walk proudly upon, after I die, I will be under it. So to be humble like the earth. Why? Because you are going to go into the earth. We are all going to go into the earth. There is a whole separate talk in owning and developing the characteristics of the earth within us. To be humble, to be low, that if somebody is to walk over you, to still remain humble, to always stay low, to take the humbler route. By remembering your end, and so to develop these characteristics of the Earth inside of yourself.

v.                   Another, is studying the life of the Prophet (saw) and the Companions (ra) and other muslim personalities, the more you study –that is the benefit for people who are doing ilm, who study ahadith, Quran and come to bayanaat -the more and more you hear these stories, the more you realize your own rank, your own shortcomings, your own lax. So studying the lives of these people and always having some type of connection with the life of Prophet (sallalaahu alaihi wassallim). And actually looking at the life of the Prophet (saw) there are so many ahadith out there, that we get surprised! There would be rural people who would come to the Prophet (s.a.w.); Imagine if somebody from the village comes to us, and talks to us rudely, and mistreats us, how would we react to that? The way we treat them, the way we look down upon them. This happened to the Prophet (sallaahu alaihi wasallim) all the time, thereare people are tugging at his shawl, treading on him, poking him, asking him, and still answering in a very nice way. Talking with love and kindness. So he showed this aspect to the HIGhEST degree!

AMALI:  we will end with some of these practical remedies. And all of these have to do with mukhalifat of the nafs: Going against our nafs. Takabbur is such a thing and I often explain to people, that if you have something that is crooked to one side, like an iron rod, what would you do to straighten it? You pull it to the other side. When you pull it to the other side, then what happens? It straightens!

Therefore in tasawwuf and tazkiya, this is what you have to do. Some people say this is extreme. Well, we are already living our life on an extreme, on one extreme. When we walk on the other extreme for some time, not your whole life, in order to battle the other extreme, Allah Ta’ala will put you in the middle. Right? So we have to do these things when we feel that we have takabbur in ourselves.

And we’ll talk about some anecdote along the way to exhibit how this can occur:

1.                   Is to do acts of humility openly. To show humbleness or acts of humility, openly. In front of people, so that it goes in you. The way you eat: eating in alow position, opening the door for somebody else, letting them go first, not just for manners, but to get rid of that takabbur in yourself. Somebody who you think is younger than you, beneath you in any way. It’s very easy to open doors for your mother in law or your teachers. You’ll get bonus marks for that, right? But open the door for a student, open the door for a child, open the door for somebody you feel as if they should do work for you. So that Takabbur leaves you from the inside! So doing such acts for those whom you think are lower than you! So doing acts of humility openly.

Infact our scholars, and mashaikh, who were, they took this to a higher level, beginner lessons of purification was always this: to get rid of takabbur; to erase oneself, rigorously, completely. Once oneself has been erased, only then can a building be built upon it.

There is a famous story Muhammad Tayyab, he was a student at Dar ul Uloom, Deoband. And he at a very young age, had a lot of knowledge, he got a very high position in administration of the Dar ul Uloom Deoband. He was known to be very good looking. So he wrote to his Shaykh one time who was Maulana Ashraf Ali thanwi (rh), and he wrote to him that I find within myself some vanity (that I feel as if I have begun to like myself). He didn’t use the word takabbur, but that I feel like that I have a “me” feeling inside of myself. An“Ana”.An “Ego”.I think a little bit about the fact that I am so young and I am on this position and everyone is praising me, and this is what he said, that I am feeling this. Maulaana Ashraf Ali Thanwi (rh),replied that you need to come to my spiritual retreat IMMEDIATELY, this is a MAJOR problem.

So Muhammad Tayyab, he came to his Shaykh’s khanaqah, his spiritual retreat, and over there you can imagine, that people are going and coming, there are all these major gatherings, there are these high level talks going on - spiritual discourses, and you would be awe struck - what type of gatherings would they be? That his Shaykh is calling him to, to come immediately; So when he comes to Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanwi, who says to him that you will, for three days work for me here. There is a lot of people who come to visit here, Wise people come, Seekers come, people come for their tazkiyah and their purification, so your work will be to arrange the shoes of the people who come to visit. That is it. And you are not allowed to attend the gatherings! Someone must be thinking, that I came all the way from home, and you are not allowed to attend the gatherings, who ever comes, when ever they come, your job is to arrange their shoes! For three days, this is your only job. You do that, and what happens? He did that for 3 days and he went back, that he writes himself, that in my whole life, I never again did experience that feeling of vanity ever again!

If this disease gets cleansed in a very rigorous manner, even if it seems extreme, it can have a lasting effect. but this is something that happens with our own Mashaikh. Our own Shaykh, he tells about himself, that in the beginning, his Shaykh told him that your job isto clean the bathrooms. This was in the beginning when he was in his early 20s and your job is to clean the bathrooms of the madrassah. He used to do that. And my own husband was given this job a long time ago when we got married in NYC, we were part of this masjid, which had a Hifz madrassah. So over there to you don’t have servants like over here. Over there we had to do everything, most things, ourselves, even the people who were involved in the administration. So we were involved in the school. We were in schooling. Technically we were like the principal and the assistant principal.  So our Shaykh gave my husband the job to clean the bathrooms but do it when no one is around. So that you don’t get that thought in your head that everybody is watching. So his job was to clean the washrooms.

So this is the Shaan of Allah Ta’ala:

Hadith e Paak: Who ever attains humility for the sake of Allah Ta’ala, Allah Ta’ala will grant him a high rank.

Therefore to do this practically: to show humility, to do acts of humility, to do these low level things. This is something that we can do ourselves. We go and we clean our bathrooms. We haveservants, but every now and then I am going to clean my own bathroom. I am going to clean the toilet,I’m going to fix the shoes. So this is something that will erase my takabbur if I do these types of acts.

2.                   Way is to Look at the way you speak. In the olden times this was an art that was taught to students, to never use the word “me” or “I” or “mine, but to use words like “this nobody” or this “low one” etc when referring to one self.

It comes in a hadith, that the Prophet (sallalaahu alaihi wasallim) said that when you address people, when you advise them, use the word “us”, don’t say “you people”, say“we are”. Put yourself as part of the community. The way we speak also illustrates, it reveals our state of takabbur: we have it, or we don’t have it, how much humility do we have. So looking at the way we speak.

An incident about Hazrat Abu Huraira (ra), Saahib e Rasool, a Close Companion of the Prophet (s.a.w.) was a big muhaddith, a big scholar. It comes about him that once people were sitting, and they moved their feet away from his direction out of mannerism. And so he asked them, why are you doing this, and they replied that because you are such a great Sahaaba of the Prophet (s.a.w.). To which he told them, to not do so, and that he viewed himself as the worst of the people sitting in the gathering.

Hazrat Umar’s (r.a.) incident about his victory ofBayt ul Muqaddis, Jerusalem,after twelve years, the first Qible, they have been trying to gain victory over it for so long, he went as a Victor, and it comes about him that at the time he had 12 patches on his clothes. So these are the ways that they lived their lives!

3.                   And to treat people you view as inferior, servants, younger people, who work for us, treat them with respect and view them as better than you. And this is very important because we don’t know that according to Allah Ta’ala what is the stature of a person, who is better or worse?

A hadith that one time the Prophet (s.a.w) was sitting with a Sahaaba, and he asked him about a person who passed by, that what do you think about this person? And the Sahaaba replied, that this person is such a person that if he were to say something the people would listen, if he were to send for his proposal, it would be accepted, and that this person has a high rank in our society. The Prophet (s.a.w) was quiet. Then another man passed by, and then the Prophet (saw) asked that what do you think of this man? So the Sahaaba replied that this is such a person that if he were to speak nobody would listen, if he were to propose to somebody, I would be rejected, and that this person has a low rank within our society. The Prophet (saw) answered that according to Allah Ta’ala, if the whole world was to be filled with the like of the first person, even then it would not equal the greatness of the second person!

In our eyes, we don’t know people, we don’t know the reality of the people, that’s why we can’t judge, we can’t judge anyonethat in Allah Ta’ala’s eyes who is more accepted. Potentially or is.

4.                   Be the First to say Salaam to every one you meet.

Hadith: Who ever takes the initiative to say salaam will be free from kibr (pride).

So that is something that even if the other person is older, or younger, more respectable, or not, to say salaam first.

5.                   The Last thing is to make duaa, that Allah Ta’ala rids us of the Takabbur that we have. Humility leads to gratefulness. With Takabbur we gain ungratefulness. And having gratitude: it makes a person more positive. When a person is humble: there are a lot of benefits! In becoming the humble one, nothing bothers you, nothing affects you, you are not going to have negative thoughts about people, you will be fine if somebody says something against you. And you wont even realize if somebody says something that shouldn’t have been said! People might think you are naïve. This is also in a hadith, that the momin is naïve, and simple. People think of him so. So actually when a person has humility; life is much more positive, it is easier; you never feel anything bad from people, becauase you don’t have takabbur in you! You only get hurt by people if you have takabbur. You only argue with people when you have takabbur. So this is something that we have to revive in ourselves.

One last point to make is that there is something called Tawaazo and therez something called Zull. Tawazo (Humility) is what we’re trying to get, it means humility in front of Allah Ta’ala, but it’s different than abasing yourself to the extent that you get humiliated.Zull, excessive abasement, excessive humility, is not in our Deen. Infact it comes in a hadith that a believer never humiliates himself. Never, ever, does a momin humiliate oneself. In islam one’s dignity is given a lot of significance.  A person can have humility without abasing themselves or humiliating themselves. Even in the English Language the two words are close to one another:One is humility, and the other is humiliation. Humility is a good thing, a person who practices humility will never be humiliated, but a person who doesn’t practice humility they will be humiliated, both in this world and the aakhirah.

May Allah Ta’ala grant every one the ability to work on ridding themselves of this disease.. And insha Allah we will end with a duaa.